erm, do you actually know what a Zorse is? (you were going to be GFDM, seeing as you are. . . well, not forest dwelling I suppose; but, I'll let you be the L'Stand if you wish)(xxx)
The Penguin (OHOHOH!! I love penguins!) with the Mysterious Case of Amnesia (who has amnesia again?) and the Tattoo (OH!! Of a pirate!!..can it be a pirate tattoo?!!)
Crazy (well shoot..I'm a natural at that one!) Pirate Lady (peg-leg optional--don't got one but could swagger...rather practiced at that dontchaknow)(parrot essential--I have one! I have one! Stuffed, but still......)
Dave (or should I call you Mr Valentine!) you may have whatever props are available in the wardrobe department (and you know how fantastic I am at sourcing accessories). . .
how gorgeous would you like that assistant to be? (yes, I might even cast myself. . .)(that was an amusing seasonal anecdote)(or it will be)
G The Fine French Fancy role is yours sweetheart!
(*thinks* now I'll have to add in something Scottish for Christopher)
shot great - the laughter has started already!!
mig I can see a strategic alliance between the albino crow and the pirate's parrot coming up. . . possibly in a darkened alley. . .
(-:
Mel I might write some lines for the penguin, but in the meantime work on that waddling - you're looking too much like a duck
*runs for cover*
(thought The Brit might like to be your side-kick parrot, if you'd have gone for the CPL. . . how can we accommodate him if you're the penguin?)(perhaps he could be a talking tattoo!)
You may or may not know that I have experience in the motion picture industry. If you need any special effects, I'm your man. Snow, wind, rain, explosions, gunshot holes, bullet hits. I can also do stunt driving and operate any equipment you might need. If you must cast me in a roll, please don't type cast me as I am more versatile than s fat old Italian man who was a pirate in a former life.
Yours to command - I'll be anything you want as long as I don't have to wear a) a chest wig or b) a bald wig or c) a Kay Burley mask. But I'd stretch a point even with these for you, I.
apologies for my absence, I was on a 24-hour panto character development workshop, co-hosted by Guy Ritchie, Charlie Chaplin and Alfred Hitchcock. . .
our production was talent spotted by a scout who's keen to develop our ideas into a blockbuster Hollywood movie (or perhaps it was Bollywood?)(or Dollywood, even?)
if it was Dollywood, you might be experimenting with a wig of huge blond curls, Christopher; if not, can you manage something like this please?
dinah actually, we could develop the French Fancy role a little - how's your can-can? (Christopher has access to some wonderful outfits!)
Mel tell you what, we'll turn the penguin role into a speaking one - that way the waddle doesn't have to convey as much character information! and I might take some stuffing out of the costime, it was hindering your swagger. . . but the head hanging is fabulous - very life life!!!!
Dave I might need to see you in costume, just to check out the quality of your garb you understand. . .
. . .a tall willowy blond you say? I'll rummage around in the extras department and see what I can come up with
man perfect! snow, wind, rain, explosions, gunshot holes and bullet hits are required (not that I'm giving the plot away, you understand)(for my English participants, this is no normal pantomime) as is stunt driving (magic carpets appear too) and equipment operating (to include a black hole, the time machine at CERN and a hot fat deep frying doughnut machine)
oh, and I'll need fire too please - do you do fire too?
I'm wondering if yours is a self funding role. . .
. . .on the other hand, I can think of many willing and able helpers* who will pamper, sorry, cater, to your every sartorial* requirement
(*Vicus is not amongst them)(**perhaps even personal undressing)
you will, of course, also have a company PPA on hand to arrange for cups of tea and hot chocolate and cricket updates to be provided as and when you need them
(the extra P is to ensure that s/he's devoted entirely to your assistance)
I don't think the magic carpet has reclining seats - how about a sturdy bag of magic beans? (made extra comfy with the stuffing from Mel's penguin suit)
man erm I'm not so sure about the burning in h*ll - more toasting marshmallows over a medium-sized camp-fire-pit. . . and, if you can, can you combine some fire with a bird, leaving the bird (a phoenix, obviously) unroasted with its feathers intact?
and, if it's not too much to ask, how are you with animal wrangling? to be more specific, unicorn wrangling?
Mel I think I'll need to put a little more stuffing back into that costume - the first waddling was better. . .
. . .that's enough with the waddling now!!
lovely hot goobery-free white cup of coffee coming your way, ma'am, and Dave's PPA is around for when you want a top up (only don't tell Dave)
(I'm not about at the mo, as I'm otherwise engaged. . . hee hee hee)
...but, I, this is how I look normally! In fact Dave took this very photo of me standing by his ardour when I went to see him at the end of September, just after I'd had my hair cut. You want me to play in character?
But my baby don't love nobody
but me, nobody but me
Yes everybody wants my baby
But my baby don't want nobody
but me, that's plain to see!
I'm his sweet Judy
and he is my loving man!
No time to do his duty,
loves me like no other can!
Now when my baby kisses me
upon my rosy cheeks
I just let those kisses be,
don't wash my face for weeks!
51 comments:
Oh no it's not!
. . .it's behind you. . .
(-;
*pulling up a comfy chair*
:-)
Ohhhhhhh...what pretty fonts!
Krankies or Chuckle Brothers?
<----giddy with anticipation
For sure it'll be the best and most unusual Panto ever. I'm bating my breath :)
don't bate too much or you'll pass out!
Hope you're feeling more upbeat today? I enjoyed these fonts. Letters with a gladsome mind, would you say?
I just read Christopher's comment and done a lol.
I'm currently casting for the following roles:
Main Parts
Crazy Pirate Lady (peg-leg optional)(parrot essential)
German Forest Dwelling Magician
A Fine French Fancy (a Napoleonic cross-dresser of indeterminate sex/orientation)
The Sinister Minister, and The Dexetrous Minister (non-identical, identical twins)
Joe Valentine, PI
Count Ivan Ludwig von Blackenstein, an evil Irish professor
Non-Speaking roles
An Albino Crow
Bobby the Bobby
The Penguin with the Mysterious Case of Amnesia and the Tattoo
Zorse
Scenery
Roof Top
Dark Alley Way
Lemonade Stand
Mangrove Swamp
(yes, I'm casting for scenery too)
(ps: if you don't step up to a role, you'll be allocated one)
In order of preference:
Lemonade Stand
Zorse
German Forest Dwelling Magician
Thank you for your kind consideration
see, I knew it was worth casting for scenery
erm, do you actually know what a Zorse is? (you were going to be GFDM, seeing as you are. . . well, not forest dwelling I suppose; but, I'll let you be the L'Stand if you wish)(xxx)
The Penguin (OHOHOH!! I love penguins!) with the Mysterious Case of Amnesia (who has amnesia again?) and the Tattoo (OH!! Of a pirate!!..can it be a pirate tattoo?!!)
Crazy (well shoot..I'm a natural at that one!) Pirate Lady (peg-leg optional--don't got one but could swagger...rather practiced at that dontchaknow)(parrot essential--I have one! I have one! Stuffed, but still......)
Lemonade Stand
You know I'm difficult. :-/
k....mostly I wanna be the Stork with a pegleg.
Oh wait.
Or was that a cat with sock on its head.
Hold on...I forgot.
What were the choices again?
(trying out for the penguin part dontchaknow....)
(how'm I doin'?)
Dang.
Penguin is a nonspeaking role.
k....
*waddles and flaps* :-/
I'd rather like to be an albino crow.
And I'm keen on dark alleyways on principle.
Doesn't the parrot get it's own role?
"Dang.
Penguin is a nonspeaking role.
k....
*waddles and flaps* :-/"
OMG that made me laugh!!!!!
* * * * *
I shall, of course, defer to the superior casting skills of our intrepid director/producer
.
.
.
.
...i could be a cross-dresser if nobody else wants the role...
Not that *i* want the role. I'm just trying to be helpful.
And brave.
embarassed.
never mind. YOU pick...
I've alsways wanted to be a PI. Can I have an overcoat and a low-brimmed hat? And a gorgeous female assistant?
Dave (or should I call you Mr Valentine!) you may have whatever props are available in the wardrobe department (and you know how fantastic I am at sourcing accessories). . .
how gorgeous would you like that assistant to be? (yes, I might even cast myself. . .)(that was an amusing seasonal anecdote)(or it will be)
G The Fine French Fancy role is yours sweetheart!
(*thinks* now I'll have to add in something Scottish for Christopher)
shot great - the laughter has started already!!
mig I can see a strategic alliance between the albino crow and the pirate's parrot coming up. . . possibly in a darkened alley. . .
(-:
Mel I might write some lines for the penguin, but in the meantime work on that waddling - you're looking too much like a duck
*runs for cover*
(thought The Brit might like to be your side-kick parrot, if you'd have gone for the CPL. . . how can we accommodate him if you're the penguin?)(perhaps he could be a talking tattoo!)
oh, perhaps I should add. . .
. . .Zorse is a pantonmime horse/zebra collaboration - so will need a pair of hind and a pair of front legs
. . .if anyone's interested
You may or may not know that I have experience in the motion picture industry. If you need any special effects, I'm your man. Snow, wind, rain, explosions, gunshot holes, bullet hits.
I can also do stunt driving and operate any equipment you might need.
If you must cast me in a roll, please don't type cast me as I am more versatile than s fat old Italian man who was a pirate in a former life.
Peace to you.
A tall willowy blonde assistant is what I had in mind.
If she's not available, then an alternative would be Audrey Hepburn.
A completely different alternative, i meant.
I have my own trench coat and hat.
*waddle swagger, flap flap*
*hangs penguin head*
<-- exasperated penguin
(how'm I doin'?)
Yours to command - I'll be anything you want as long as I don't have to wear a) a chest wig or b) a bald wig or c) a Kay Burley mask. But I'd stretch a point even with these for you, I.
Ooh! I could supply the mangrove swamp! AS a jpg.Of course.
And would a French maid's kit suffice for a French Fancy? Got one of those somewhere!
apologies for my absence, I was on a 24-hour panto character development workshop, co-hosted by Guy Ritchie, Charlie Chaplin and Alfred Hitchcock. . .
our production was talent spotted by a scout who's keen to develop our ideas into a blockbuster Hollywood movie (or perhaps it was Bollywood?)(or Dollywood, even?)
if it was Dollywood, you might be experimenting with a wig of huge blond curls, Christopher; if not, can you manage something like this please?
dinah actually, we could develop the French Fancy role a little - how's your can-can? (Christopher has access to some wonderful outfits!)
Mel tell you what, we'll turn the penguin role into a speaking one - that way the waddle doesn't have to convey as much character information! and I might take some stuffing out of the costime, it was hindering your swagger. . . but the head hanging is fabulous - very life life!!!!
Dave I might need to see you in costume, just to check out the quality of your garb you understand. . .
. . .a tall willowy blond you say? I'll rummage around in the extras department and see what I can come up with
man perfect! snow, wind, rain, explosions, gunshot holes and bullet hits are required (not that I'm giving the plot away, you understand)(for my English participants, this is no normal pantomime) as is stunt driving (magic carpets appear too) and equipment operating (to include a black hole, the time machine at CERN and a hot fat deep frying doughnut machine)
oh, and I'll need fire too please - do you do fire too?
Actually it was a blonde I was after. Unless you want me to play a gay role?
I will need my own dressing room, with a star on the door.
and there I was, thinking that you preferred brunettes
:-/
so, that's what the e on the end of blond is all about - really? see, I've learnt something today
(-:
you will have a whole Milky Way on your door (and some Mars Bars on your dressing room table, if you wish - to help you work, rest and play*)
(will you be requiring a lock/key for that door?)
I believe it's like French - the 'e' on the end meaning female.
I will need a personal dresser too.
I'm wondering if yours is a self funding role. . .
. . .on the other hand, I can think of many willing and able helpers* who will pamper, sorry, cater, to your every sartorial* requirement
(*Vicus is not amongst them)(**perhaps even personal undressing)
you will, of course, also have a company PPA on hand to arrange for cups of tea and hot chocolate and cricket updates to be provided as and when you need them
(the extra P is to ensure that s/he's devoted entirely to your assistance)
That sounds OK.
No doubt you'll be speaking to my agent about my fee.
you have an agent on your staff too! is there someone typing these comments for you, whilst you have a manicure?
may I have a reclining seat?
I don't think the magic carpet has reclining seats - how about a sturdy bag of magic beans? (made extra comfy with the stuffing from Mel's penguin suit)
Yes, I do fire. All you need to do is get me a set of the production plans and story board and I'll make sure we all burn in hell.
It's me that likes the brunettes. Blonde just doesn't do it for me. Dark eyes too, brown ones.
Now, on with the show, This is It!
*checks*
(I suddenly feel thinner.....)
*flapping and hanging head*
(note no waddling)
*sigh*
(I know lots of sighing penguins!)
*flapping*
(I don't like fish....can I be a coffee drinking penguin, please?)
*flappping!!*
http://melsdream.blogspot.com/2009/12/happy-penguin.html
*flapping flapping!!*
(See!! SEE!!!)
:-/
man erm I'm not so sure about the burning in h*ll - more toasting marshmallows over a medium-sized camp-fire-pit. . . and, if you can, can you combine some fire with a bird, leaving the bird (a phoenix, obviously) unroasted with its feathers intact?
and, if it's not too much to ask, how are you with animal wrangling? to be more specific, unicorn wrangling?
Mel I think I'll need to put a little more stuffing back into that costume - the first waddling was better. . .
. . .that's enough with the waddling now!!
lovely hot goobery-free white cup of coffee coming your way, ma'am, and Dave's PPA is around for when you want a top up (only don't tell Dave)
(I'm not about at the mo, as I'm otherwise engaged. . . hee hee hee)
ps: anyone fancy being a Funky Gibbon? might be a singing role. . . a song about string and how everybody needs it. . .
...but, I, this is how I look normally! In fact Dave took this very photo of me standing by his ardour when I went to see him at the end of September, just after I'd had my hair cut. You want me to play in character?
yes please! (but I'll not accept responsibility for any chopping off of the heads of rivals)
I can can-can! Well, 40 years ago I could. And did. On stage. If I say it was a riot...
*shaking penguiny head*
(can't sing, can waddle!)
*flapflapFLAP!!!*
(can waddle and flap AND FLAP! HA!!.....k.....kinda limited in my skillset...LOL)
:>
Squawk!
I mean Croak! Flap! Ark hop Wrorkk!
And such like.
mig excellent - no vocal coaching needed for you!
Mel I might have to write a scene for a duet between the penguin and the albino crow. . .
(-:
dinah I'll get Christopher to bring the costumes over - I'm so chuffed that you can can-can
*checks out the length of penguiny legs*
*hangs penguin head*
(oh....*sniffle* I can can-can't...)
But you didn't mention the dancing!! I was hoping for a flap de deux. With hopping and neck stretching.
Graargle-wraaaaaark Mrrrk!
(rough translation - Oh but of course you can Mel)
:>
(can waltz!)
*happily waltzing*
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